I wanted to write a little something about Contamination OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) because I am really struggling at the moment with the anxiety of the situation. I have never really struggled with contamination ocd until fairly recently, I'd occasionally had a bit of a tougher time but I had never truly experienced it this badly before. Contamination OCD is the fear of things around you being contaminated, for example some people might worry about the cleanliness of their hands and be worried that the germs on their hands could cause a threat to their wellbeing and so their OCD may cause them to complete compulsions (essentially tasks) like washing their hands multiple times or for a certain about of time to relax the anxiety around this fear. It can be severe to the extent where they cause severe damage to their hands when carrying out this compulsion.
A lot of people are experiencing what it can be like for someone with compulsive tendencies where they need to wash their hands during this current health pandemic. People are experiencing the desire to regularly wash their hands more in order to feel safe and protected from the virus, but this doesn't necessarily mean that those people have OCD, some might but most aren't. I've seen a few people explain that it is giving them insight into how people with OCD struggle because in order to feel safe, people are carrying out a compulsion.
I've have show OCD symptoms since I was a young child and was formally diagnosed with a strand of OCD called Obsessive Thoughts when I was 17 years old. With the current global health pandemic I have seen a significant increase in anxiety around contamination. I'm currently terrified that everything I touch, use or consume is contaminated. I have a constant anxiety that one of these things will give me the virus or that I will get sick. Every single cough or sneeze in my home, from my family members gives me an anxiety attack. I begin panicking, wondering where they are in the house, what could have been contaminated and I cannot shake the anxiety and continuous worry for a very long time.
I'm struggling to eat food that I haven't prepared myself and begin feeling sick and anxious when I eat something prepared by a member of my own family because I'm worried about the potential contamination and the chances I could be putting germs into my body. I'm worried pans, cutlery, plates and glasses haven't been cleaned correctly and that the risk for potential contamination there. I don't eat meat or eggs and I get anxious, worrying that these things have contaminated my food and I will get sick.
I can't control 4 other adults hygiene habits and I can't expect everyone to cater towards my ocd. I have to put my trust in my family members and right now that is horrendously terrifying because I'm constantly anxious about getting sick. I've tried to isolate myself to my room as much as possible because it's the only room where I feel safe, but I feel completely trapped and am continuously worrying about what could potentially be contaminated and it's exhausting. I'm scared and I'm tired and I spend all my waking day worried about germs and staying clean and it is incredibly difficult to quieten the anxiety and ocd spiralling in my thoughts.
Some help for Anxiety and OCD can be found here:
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